Archive for the ‘Resolutions’ Category

Resolved

It is mid-February and by this point I should be halfway through my horror novel. I’m not. I have not even begun. Well, not exactly. I have written the opening sentence. What, you’re asking? What happened to the writing goals I set out at the first of the year? Life happened.

I started a temporary position the third week in December. With no new writing projects in sight, it was a simple matter of economics – keep a roof over my head or live on the street. Having been there, done that once already, I wasn’t willing to do it all over again. Between the mind numbing job, a lingering illness and my mother’s health issues, I have not written anything.

I should amend the above sentence. I have written some things – a few jokes for my upcoming comedy routine, a poem and, did I mention, the first sentence of my novel. I have also become involved in a collaborative group writing project (the details which I can’t disclose as yet) and extended my writing services to a local theater group. In the past, I would be berating myself for failing to meet my goals. The newer, mature version of myself accepts this happens and sometimes the down time reveals your true path to you.

I have been questioning whether or not I was meant to be a writer. Sure, I call myself a writer. But I don’t write. That’s a little like saying you’re reading a book but you’re still on the first sentence. However, the mind numbing job made me realize I don’t want to do it for the rest of my life. If there is a hell, hell is scheduling fingerprinting appointments and repeating the same words over and over and over and over and over…well, you get the picture.

The past week I’ve realized what made me happiest was writing. The perks of being my own boss and working my own hours weren’t bad either. Yes, I recognize I may still need to work to support myself until I land enough work to keep me afloat, but I’m seeking writing positions. I am applying for a journalism position in Alaska and offering my writing services to local businesses. It took the job to make me realize that, yes, I am a writer and this is the path I want to follow.

To that end, I am applying the following 25 Things Writers Should Stop Doing (Right Fucking Now): http://terribleminds.com/ramble/2012/01/03/25-things-writers-should-stop-doing/. If this doesn’t motivate me, nothing will.

 

 

 

 

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2012: A New Leaf

Have you made your New Year’s writing resolutions?

I feel like Lisa Simpson in The Simpson’s episode, “The Book Job.” It’s easier to talk about writing than it is to do it. I have been telling people I’m writing a horror novel for the past three years, but all I have to show for it is a prologue and the first page of Chapter One, which I keep rewriting. Somehow I’m always able to find a distraction to keep me from the task at hand.

It’s not that I don’t love writing. Writing keeps me sane. When my world is crumbling around me, I can always rely on writing to steady me. I can blame it on the inane comments of an editor who told me I didn’t know how to write or a professor who told me I would never amount to anything. If I’m honest with myself, it comes down to fear. What if I’m not good enough? What if I have nothing to say? What if I fail at my dream?

My inner critic starts yammering away at me and drowns out the positive affirmations I have received. One year I attended Dark & Stormy Nights, a mystery writing conference in the Chicago land area. One of the attending writers read and critiqued the first chapter of a mystery novel I was working on, but never finished. When she was done, she requested I send her the revised chapter. When I asked her if she did this for everyone, she replied no. She only requested to see revisions from persons who showed talent. Later that evening, she introduced me to a bookseller and said, “You’ll be selling her books someday.”

2012 I’m turning over a new leaf. I am dedicating this year to finishing a project. I have numerous projects in various stages of completion. I want to complete one, just one.

I turn to you. This forum is open to all who need encouragement and advice to push through the fear. I have set modest goals. Each week I will post my successes and my failures. After all, in 2010 I was gifted with an apartment, in 2011 I was gifted with a new position, and in 2012 I will be gifted with a published manuscript.

Cheers and may your writing dreams come true this year.